We?re talking about scarcity? or rarity for lack of a better word. Once we have acquired a desire for something, the harder it is to get, the more we want it.I have a friend who is always in relationships. She is never single. There?s always a next lover hanging in the sidelines while she?s breaking things off with the soon-to-be-ex-lover. Every relationship in which I?ve seen her over the years has been destructive to her confidence and her quality of life. She dates narcissistic guys […]
The post Stand Up to Codependence appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:7:"content";a:1:{s:7:"encoded";s:4730:"I have a friend who is always in relationships. She is never single. There?s always a next lover hanging in the sidelines while she?s breaking things off with the soon-to-be-ex-lover. Every relationship in which I?ve seen her over the years has been destructive to her confidence and her quality of life. She dates narcissistic guys with dominant personalities who are concerned mostly with themselves and their own gratification and she spends the course of the relationship bending over backwards to make them happy, knowing in the back of her mind that the same courtesy will not be reciprocated. Even though she knows that this pattern is unhealthy, she always tends to find herself in a rut, trying to pick of the pieces of her broken self-esteem after these guys have worn her out and moved on to the next codependent chick.
?Am I not good enough for him?? ?What does she have that I don?t have? Is it because she has a better body than me?? ?Is it because I?m still in school and haven?t started my career?? ? Was I not a good enough sex partner?? ?It?s because he doesn?t like my cooking, isn?t it?? ?Is it because I didn?t do that thing he asked me to do that one time?? These are typical questions I?ve heard her ask as she tries to figure out what is wrong with her that deems her unlovable.
Codependency is a complex term which can describe someone who puts their needs at a lower priority level than others and often is preoccupied with the needs of others. Codependency can affect many different types of relationships such as romantic relationships, friendships and work/school relationships. It?s a condition that usually develops during childhood and can be detrimental to one?s quality of life for the rest of her life.
I am amazed by how many young women I know who are codependent and find themselves stuck in relationships in which they lose their sense of self and end up being controlled by others.
Perhaps this is a result of the frequency of broken family structures in our society. Codependence could also be partially due to the messages that the media sends to women of all ages that they are never skinny enough, good enough in bed or youthful-looking enough. Young women grow up feeling insufficient and develop a condition that is characterized by extreme dependence on another person or object. These dependencies can be emotional, social or physical. Codependent people depend on fixes, externals and inappropriate people for gratification.
Whether you?re the girl who can?t say no to your classmate who always makes you do all of their work, or you are in a relationship with someone who could care less about your needs or you?re a mother whose life is defined by your kids or you have an affliction for alcohol which is the only thing that gets you through the day? there are ways that you can fight your tendency to be codependent and give yourself a chance to find yourself, love yourself and get on track to being independent.
You absolutely have to set boundaries. Without boundaries, anyone can treat you however they like and you?ll have no right to complain about it if you choose to stay in the situation. Once you?ve set those boundaries, you have to declare them to the person or object with whom you are in the relationship.
1. What is important to you,
2. What you will tolerate and
3. What you absolutely will not tolerate
When you put your cards on the table in the beginning, there is no room for surprise in the future. Once your boundaries have been established, the key is stick to your guns. If you bend your boundaries once, you?ll be inclined to bend them twice and thrice. Then you may find yourself trapped within the confines of a controlling lover, friend or substance. Like most things, sticking to your boundaries comes with practice. The more you agree to things that are important to you and say ?no? to the things that need to be eliminated from your life, the better you?ll be at maintaining your boundaries and the more control you?ll have over your own life.
The post Stand Up to Codependence appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";}s:3:"wfw";a:1:{s:10:"commentrss";s:68:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/stand-up-to-codependence/feed/";}s:5:"slash";a:1:{s:8:"comments";s:1:"0";}s:7:"summary";s:580:"I have a friend who is always in relationships. She is never single. There?s always a next lover hanging in the sidelines while she?s breaking things off with the soon-to-be-ex-lover. Every relationship in which I?ve seen her over the years has been destructive to her confidence and her quality of life. She dates narcissistic guys […]
The post Stand Up to Codependence appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:12:"atom_content";s:4730:"I have a friend who is always in relationships. She is never single. There?s always a next lover hanging in the sidelines while she?s breaking things off with the soon-to-be-ex-lover. Every relationship in which I?ve seen her over the years has been destructive to her confidence and her quality of life. She dates narcissistic guys with dominant personalities who are concerned mostly with themselves and their own gratification and she spends the course of the relationship bending over backwards to make them happy, knowing in the back of her mind that the same courtesy will not be reciprocated. Even though she knows that this pattern is unhealthy, she always tends to find herself in a rut, trying to pick of the pieces of her broken self-esteem after these guys have worn her out and moved on to the next codependent chick.
?Am I not good enough for him?? ?What does she have that I don?t have? Is it because she has a better body than me?? ?Is it because I?m still in school and haven?t started my career?? ? Was I not a good enough sex partner?? ?It?s because he doesn?t like my cooking, isn?t it?? ?Is it because I didn?t do that thing he asked me to do that one time?? These are typical questions I?ve heard her ask as she tries to figure out what is wrong with her that deems her unlovable.
Codependency is a complex term which can describe someone who puts their needs at a lower priority level than others and often is preoccupied with the needs of others. Codependency can affect many different types of relationships such as romantic relationships, friendships and work/school relationships. It?s a condition that usually develops during childhood and can be detrimental to one?s quality of life for the rest of her life.
I am amazed by how many young women I know who are codependent and find themselves stuck in relationships in which they lose their sense of self and end up being controlled by others.
Perhaps this is a result of the frequency of broken family structures in our society. Codependence could also be partially due to the messages that the media sends to women of all ages that they are never skinny enough, good enough in bed or youthful-looking enough. Young women grow up feeling insufficient and develop a condition that is characterized by extreme dependence on another person or object. These dependencies can be emotional, social or physical. Codependent people depend on fixes, externals and inappropriate people for gratification.
Whether you?re the girl who can?t say no to your classmate who always makes you do all of their work, or you are in a relationship with someone who could care less about your needs or you?re a mother whose life is defined by your kids or you have an affliction for alcohol which is the only thing that gets you through the day? there are ways that you can fight your tendency to be codependent and give yourself a chance to find yourself, love yourself and get on track to being independent.
You absolutely have to set boundaries. Without boundaries, anyone can treat you however they like and you?ll have no right to complain about it if you choose to stay in the situation. Once you?ve set those boundaries, you have to declare them to the person or object with whom you are in the relationship.
1. What is important to you,
2. What you will tolerate and
3. What you absolutely will not tolerate
When you put your cards on the table in the beginning, there is no room for surprise in the future. Once your boundaries have been established, the key is stick to your guns. If you bend your boundaries once, you?ll be inclined to bend them twice and thrice. Then you may find yourself trapped within the confines of a controlling lover, friend or substance. Like most things, sticking to your boundaries comes with practice. The more you agree to things that are important to you and say ?no? to the things that need to be eliminated from your life, the better you?ll be at maintaining your boundaries and the more control you?ll have over your own life.
The post Stand Up to Codependence appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:14:"date_timestamp";i:1640620011;}i:1;a:14:{s:5:"title";s:22:"The Four P?s of Dating";s:4:"link";s:60:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/the-four-ps-of-dating/";s:8:"comments";s:68:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/the-four-ps-of-dating/#respond";s:2:"dc";a:1:{s:7:"creator";s:14:"Shannon Fisher";}s:7:"pubdate";s:31:"Mon, 27 Dec 2021 15:40:44 +0000";s:8:"category";s:49:"Dating Advicedatingonline datingPlacepriceProduct";s:4:"guid";s:34:"https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=8497";s:11:"description";s:546:"As an avid observer of people and their habits (especially those pertaining to dating), I have identified two truths about many women. The first truth is that there are many single women out there who want to meet men. The second truth is that many of these single women who claim that the want to […]
The post The Four P’s of Dating appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:7:"content";a:1:{s:7:"encoded";s:4952:"As an avid observer of people and their habits (especially those pertaining to dating), I have identified two truths about many women. The first truth is that there are many single women out there who want to meet men. The second truth is that many of these single women who claim that the want to meet men hesitate or pass up opportunities to do so.
If you live the life of a recluse, sitting in a cubicle or office alone all day, emailing and texting instead of engaging in actual verbal conversations with coworkers and clients, immediately plugging your iPod in the moment you enter the subway to head home from work, then retreating to an empty house where you stay all night, painting your toenails over a bottle of Pinot Grigio while watching Sex & the City On Demand; I have news for you. You?re never going to meet a man. I have more news for you. It’s you’re own fault. It’s a tough pill to swallow, I know… But trust me, it’s a lot tougher (and more expensive) to swallow Zoloft for the rest of your life because you’re depressed and alone.
I take that back. If we absolutely must follow the ?never say never? rule, then you could possibly meet a guy while being a hermit. If he?s someone you work with or a classmate, then love might evolve organically. Otherwise, you?re S.O.L.
I?m not suggesting that you head out to the clubs every night in your tightest dress and highest heels. I?m not suggesting that you get online and sign up for every Meet-Up group in your city. I?m not suggesting using an online dating service either. Getting out and giving yourself the opportunity to meet people can be as simple as saying ?Yes? the next time your girlfriend invites you to happy hour or to be her wing (wo)man at her cousin?s wedding. (FYI: Weddings are GREAT places to meet men).
Let?s go back to college Marketing 101: The Four P?s.
You are the product. Your goal is to sell yourself? not in the literal sense, unless the idea of incarceration turns you on, in which case, I don?t know why you?re even reading this blog post.
You must identify your own value. Know your worth. Be confident about how fabulous you are. Most men are attracted to a woman?s confidence. Those who are not, are not the types of men you should be looking to meet anyway. They are the types who only do well with codependent women with low self esteem, but I digress.
You must position yourself in places at which the type of guy you?re looking to meet will be likely to pop up. If you like artsy people, then try going to an art exhibit/happy hour. (For my DC-dwellers, Phillips After 5 is worth looking into). If you are looking for a lawyer with impeccable style, then you may want to check out an upscale restaurant in the business center of your city where a lot of lawyers work (Another suggestion for Washingtonians would be the Prime Rib, which was so obviously decorated to appeal primarily to men). Be strategic? in life (and dating) it?s all about being in the right place at the right time.
Remember, you can meet the man of your dreams ANYwhere at ANY time. ANYwhere includes the grocery store, the gym, Starbucks and the line at the DMV. I will not suggest that you get dolled up and dawn your Sunday finest, but I will suggest that you be open to conversation and to the opportunities that could pop up in the most random of circumstances.
Now that you?ve figured out where to go, you must package yourself accordingly and put your best foot forward. Dress appropriately for the event to which you are going. Be open to conversation ? being antisocial will immediately disqualify you from the game. Most importantly: carry yourself with confidence and a smile. Flash those pearly whites! Even if they’re not exactly white… I’m sure no one will notice. You?d be surprised at the difference a smile can make.
Believe me, meeting people isn?t as hard as it seems. It all starts with a conscious willingness to leave your cave!
The post The Four P’s of Dating appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";}s:3:"wfw";a:1:{s:10:"commentrss";s:65:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/the-four-ps-of-dating/feed/";}s:5:"slash";a:1:{s:8:"comments";s:1:"0";}s:7:"summary";s:546:"As an avid observer of people and their habits (especially those pertaining to dating), I have identified two truths about many women. The first truth is that there are many single women out there who want to meet men. The second truth is that many of these single women who claim that the want to […]
The post The Four P’s of Dating appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:12:"atom_content";s:4952:"As an avid observer of people and their habits (especially those pertaining to dating), I have identified two truths about many women. The first truth is that there are many single women out there who want to meet men. The second truth is that many of these single women who claim that the want to meet men hesitate or pass up opportunities to do so.
If you live the life of a recluse, sitting in a cubicle or office alone all day, emailing and texting instead of engaging in actual verbal conversations with coworkers and clients, immediately plugging your iPod in the moment you enter the subway to head home from work, then retreating to an empty house where you stay all night, painting your toenails over a bottle of Pinot Grigio while watching Sex & the City On Demand; I have news for you. You?re never going to meet a man. I have more news for you. It’s you’re own fault. It’s a tough pill to swallow, I know… But trust me, it’s a lot tougher (and more expensive) to swallow Zoloft for the rest of your life because you’re depressed and alone.
I take that back. If we absolutely must follow the ?never say never? rule, then you could possibly meet a guy while being a hermit. If he?s someone you work with or a classmate, then love might evolve organically. Otherwise, you?re S.O.L.
I?m not suggesting that you head out to the clubs every night in your tightest dress and highest heels. I?m not suggesting that you get online and sign up for every Meet-Up group in your city. I?m not suggesting using an online dating service either. Getting out and giving yourself the opportunity to meet people can be as simple as saying ?Yes? the next time your girlfriend invites you to happy hour or to be her wing (wo)man at her cousin?s wedding. (FYI: Weddings are GREAT places to meet men).
Let?s go back to college Marketing 101: The Four P?s.
You are the product. Your goal is to sell yourself? not in the literal sense, unless the idea of incarceration turns you on, in which case, I don?t know why you?re even reading this blog post.
You must identify your own value. Know your worth. Be confident about how fabulous you are. Most men are attracted to a woman?s confidence. Those who are not, are not the types of men you should be looking to meet anyway. They are the types who only do well with codependent women with low self esteem, but I digress.
You must position yourself in places at which the type of guy you?re looking to meet will be likely to pop up. If you like artsy people, then try going to an art exhibit/happy hour. (For my DC-dwellers, Phillips After 5 is worth looking into). If you are looking for a lawyer with impeccable style, then you may want to check out an upscale restaurant in the business center of your city where a lot of lawyers work (Another suggestion for Washingtonians would be the Prime Rib, which was so obviously decorated to appeal primarily to men). Be strategic? in life (and dating) it?s all about being in the right place at the right time.
Remember, you can meet the man of your dreams ANYwhere at ANY time. ANYwhere includes the grocery store, the gym, Starbucks and the line at the DMV. I will not suggest that you get dolled up and dawn your Sunday finest, but I will suggest that you be open to conversation and to the opportunities that could pop up in the most random of circumstances.
Now that you?ve figured out where to go, you must package yourself accordingly and put your best foot forward. Dress appropriately for the event to which you are going. Be open to conversation ? being antisocial will immediately disqualify you from the game. Most importantly: carry yourself with confidence and a smile. Flash those pearly whites! Even if they’re not exactly white… I’m sure no one will notice. You?d be surprised at the difference a smile can make.
Believe me, meeting people isn?t as hard as it seems. It all starts with a conscious willingness to leave your cave!
The post The Four P’s of Dating appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:14:"date_timestamp";i:1640619644;}i:2;a:14:{s:5:"title";s:19:"Being Too Available";s:4:"link";s:58:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/being-too-available/";s:8:"comments";s:66:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/being-too-available/#respond";s:2:"dc";a:1:{s:7:"creator";s:14:"Shannon Fisher";}s:7:"pubdate";s:31:"Mon, 27 Dec 2021 15:32:48 +0000";s:8:"category";s:79:"Relationship AdviceBeing Too Availablehappiness in a relationship.Too Available";s:4:"guid";s:34:"https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=8492";s:11:"description";s:535:"It is in our DNA to always want that which seems the least attainable. The fabulous Christian Louboutin pumps you saw in Vogue, the Hermès travel bag you?ve been drooling over, and even your celeb crush who makes you hyperventilate when he appears on your TV screen (for me, this is LL Cool J) are […]
The post Being Too Available appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:7:"content";a:1:{s:7:"encoded";s:5323:"It is in our DNA to always want that which seems the least attainable. The fabulous Christian Louboutin pumps you saw in Vogue, the Hermès travel bag you?ve been drooling over, and even your celeb crush who makes you hyperventilate when he appears on your TV screen (for me, this is LL Cool J) are all examples. Why do we want these coveted things? Simple: because they are difficult to get our perfectly manicured fingers on! The same applies in the case of romantic relationships. We?ve all seen examples of the ?Playing Hard to Get? game gone wrong on our favorite sitcoms, so we know that it doesn?t work every time. I?m not encouraging you to play games, but I am encouraging you to become less available in order to strengthen your courtier?s desire.
Last night, I had a late night chit-chat with my aunt who is now in her 50s and has been married several times. She was gorgeous in her youth; with a voluptuous figure, long, silky black hair that flowed down her back and a beautiful face. She was the object of many men?s desire and could have taken her pick among a vast pool of great catches. She made the mistake of wasting 5 years of her youth on a guy who basically got bored. She was always available at his every beck and call. He knew that he could have her whenever he wanted her and he took advantage. Shes currently involved in a happy, healthy relationship with her husband. She gave me the following advice: Don?t ever make yourself too available or you?ll be taken for granted.
I have learned from my personal experiences that giving 100% too soon and being ever-available can be poison to my own happiness in a relationship. Think about it: would your desire for a Rolex watch be weaker or stronger than it is now if you always had access to it? Would you want a super sexy Aston Martin, of which only 52 were made, as badly as you do now if you knew that you could have it at any given moment? Why? Because you can?t have it!
We?re talking about scarcity? or rarity for lack of a better word. Once we have acquired a desire for something, the harder it is to get, the more we want it.
Enter the male psyche. Men are pretty simple for the most part. They see what they want. They want what they want. They get what they want. They get bored. So if you sit by the phone constantly waiting for him to call and say yes to every proposition he makes, he?s going to get over you? fast. I know what you?re thinking? when you really like someone, you want to be with them all the time. This is true. But would you rather be with your new love interest every waking moment of the day now, which could eventually lead to boredom due to your lack of elusiveness OR would you rather continue to live your life, participate in your hobbies, be a valuable member of your social circle, all while maintaining the interest of your new beau?
By now you?re wondering how to do it. It?s quite simple. Stop saying yes to everything. If you are available all weekend and have absolutely nothing planned and he asks to see you both Saturday and Sunday, pick one day to offer him. If he asks you out on Tuesday and you?re busy, don?t change your plans. Tell him that Tuesday doesn?t work for you and let him work around it. If he really wants to see you, he will find a way to make it work. Stop taking your cell phone everywhere with you ? yes, I too am guilty of even taking it into the ladies room with me for fear of missing that call. If he calls and you miss it, big deal. He?ll call back or you can call him at your convenience.
The point is that you shouldn?t bend over backwards in the early stages of a relationship. If the guy is courting you, it?s because he likes YOU. He doesn?t want the desperate version of you (unless you were desperate when he met you, which is another topic for another blog post) and he?s not looking for the Stepford wife version of you either. If he wants to see you, he?ll work with YOUR schedule to make it happen. If he wants to talk to you, he?ll call YOU and if he doesn?t get you, he?ll pick up the phone when YOU call him back. If you are always available he?ll get bored. Plain and simple. You won?t be worth the chase because there is nothing to chase! If he?s not willing to wait for your time, then he?s not worth it. On to the next!
The post Being Too Available appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";}s:3:"wfw";a:1:{s:10:"commentrss";s:63:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/being-too-available/feed/";}s:5:"slash";a:1:{s:8:"comments";s:1:"0";}s:7:"summary";s:535:"It is in our DNA to always want that which seems the least attainable. The fabulous Christian Louboutin pumps you saw in Vogue, the Hermès travel bag you?ve been drooling over, and even your celeb crush who makes you hyperventilate when he appears on your TV screen (for me, this is LL Cool J) are […]
The post Being Too Available appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:12:"atom_content";s:5323:"It is in our DNA to always want that which seems the least attainable. The fabulous Christian Louboutin pumps you saw in Vogue, the Hermès travel bag you?ve been drooling over, and even your celeb crush who makes you hyperventilate when he appears on your TV screen (for me, this is LL Cool J) are all examples. Why do we want these coveted things? Simple: because they are difficult to get our perfectly manicured fingers on! The same applies in the case of romantic relationships. We?ve all seen examples of the ?Playing Hard to Get? game gone wrong on our favorite sitcoms, so we know that it doesn?t work every time. I?m not encouraging you to play games, but I am encouraging you to become less available in order to strengthen your courtier?s desire.
Last night, I had a late night chit-chat with my aunt who is now in her 50s and has been married several times. She was gorgeous in her youth; with a voluptuous figure, long, silky black hair that flowed down her back and a beautiful face. She was the object of many men?s desire and could have taken her pick among a vast pool of great catches. She made the mistake of wasting 5 years of her youth on a guy who basically got bored. She was always available at his every beck and call. He knew that he could have her whenever he wanted her and he took advantage. Shes currently involved in a happy, healthy relationship with her husband. She gave me the following advice: Don?t ever make yourself too available or you?ll be taken for granted.
I have learned from my personal experiences that giving 100% too soon and being ever-available can be poison to my own happiness in a relationship. Think about it: would your desire for a Rolex watch be weaker or stronger than it is now if you always had access to it? Would you want a super sexy Aston Martin, of which only 52 were made, as badly as you do now if you knew that you could have it at any given moment? Why? Because you can?t have it!
We?re talking about scarcity? or rarity for lack of a better word. Once we have acquired a desire for something, the harder it is to get, the more we want it.
Enter the male psyche. Men are pretty simple for the most part. They see what they want. They want what they want. They get what they want. They get bored. So if you sit by the phone constantly waiting for him to call and say yes to every proposition he makes, he?s going to get over you? fast. I know what you?re thinking? when you really like someone, you want to be with them all the time. This is true. But would you rather be with your new love interest every waking moment of the day now, which could eventually lead to boredom due to your lack of elusiveness OR would you rather continue to live your life, participate in your hobbies, be a valuable member of your social circle, all while maintaining the interest of your new beau?
By now you?re wondering how to do it. It?s quite simple. Stop saying yes to everything. If you are available all weekend and have absolutely nothing planned and he asks to see you both Saturday and Sunday, pick one day to offer him. If he asks you out on Tuesday and you?re busy, don?t change your plans. Tell him that Tuesday doesn?t work for you and let him work around it. If he really wants to see you, he will find a way to make it work. Stop taking your cell phone everywhere with you ? yes, I too am guilty of even taking it into the ladies room with me for fear of missing that call. If he calls and you miss it, big deal. He?ll call back or you can call him at your convenience.
The point is that you shouldn?t bend over backwards in the early stages of a relationship. If the guy is courting you, it?s because he likes YOU. He doesn?t want the desperate version of you (unless you were desperate when he met you, which is another topic for another blog post) and he?s not looking for the Stepford wife version of you either. If he wants to see you, he?ll work with YOUR schedule to make it happen. If he wants to talk to you, he?ll call YOU and if he doesn?t get you, he?ll pick up the phone when YOU call him back. If you are always available he?ll get bored. Plain and simple. You won?t be worth the chase because there is nothing to chase! If he?s not willing to wait for your time, then he?s not worth it. On to the next!
The post Being Too Available appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:14:"date_timestamp";i:1640619168;}i:3;a:14:{s:5:"title";s:21:"Don?t Go to Bed Angry";s:4:"link";s:59:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/dont-go-to-bed-angry/";s:8:"comments";s:67:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/dont-go-to-bed-angry/#respond";s:2:"dc";a:1:{s:7:"creator";s:14:"Shannon Fisher";}s:7:"pubdate";s:31:"Mon, 27 Dec 2021 15:25:24 +0000";s:8:"category";s:83:"Dating Adviceacting angryAngerangryangry feelingsangry womanbitchy moodbitchy women";s:4:"guid";s:34:"https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=8488";s:11:"description";s:543:"We?ve all been there before. Your lover does something that pisses you off, you get angry, you passive aggressively decide to deal with it later, and then you lay awake all night thinking about what a prick he is while he is soundly asleep. What happens in the morning? You wake up pissed off and […]
The post Don’t Go to Bed Angry appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:7:"content";a:1:{s:7:"encoded";s:3477:"We?ve all been there before. Your lover does something that pisses you off, you get angry, you passive aggressively decide to deal with it later, and then you lay awake all night thinking about what a prick he is while he is soundly asleep. What happens in the morning? You wake up pissed off and sleepy because you were up all night giving him evil looks and poking him. He then wonders why you?re in such a bitchy mood and you don?t understand why he?s so clueless.
Ahhh, the joys of cohabitation.
Many people would rather not discuss issues right away, as tension can be high in the moments immediately following hurt feelings, so they do what is called ?sleeping on it? with hopes that their thoughts will be sorted out by the morning. Sometimes this works, but many times what happens when we go to bed angry, is we let tension and anger simmer for hours.
Studies actually prove that sleep preserves emotionally charged events. Sitting on our hurt feelings can only worsen the way we feel because we develop feelings of self righteousness and resentment towards the other person, and the way we feel will be stored in our permanent memory. We have a whole night to think about what happened from our perspective and to build stories around the actual facts, which is not good for us emotionally or for our partners (or anyone else who has to deal with us the next day).
If you MUST wait until the next morning to deal with the issue at hand, I?d like to offer some tips to calm you down and keep you from doing anything crazy to your beau while he?s asleep.
1. Think about the facts ? not the story that you created around the facts. The facts are what actually happened. Your story is what you felt, thought, blah blah blah.
2. Check your ego – Figure out if you?re feelings are actually hurt, or if your ego just won?t let you back down from your stance.
3. To combat feeling like you?ve been victimized, think about three things that you love about your partner or that your partner does for you for which you can?t thank him enough. This exercise should remind you of how much you appreciate him and why you?re with him in the first place.
4. To combat feelings of self righteousness, I suggest thinking of three things that you do that make you really difficult to deal with. Do you leave your hair in the sink? Do you sing horribly in the shower? Do you wake up super early and expect him to wake up as well even though he doesn?t have to be at work until later in the day? Pick three things that you wouldn?t even be able to stand about yourself. This exercise lessens my feelings of victimization and puts you both on an even playing field, because it reminds you that you are not a perfect princess (as much as you would like to think that you are).
After all of that, if you still feel angry, then I would suggest sleeping on the couch ? or making him!
The post Don’t Go to Bed Angry appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";}s:3:"wfw";a:1:{s:10:"commentrss";s:64:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/dont-go-to-bed-angry/feed/";}s:5:"slash";a:1:{s:8:"comments";s:1:"0";}s:7:"summary";s:543:"We?ve all been there before. Your lover does something that pisses you off, you get angry, you passive aggressively decide to deal with it later, and then you lay awake all night thinking about what a prick he is while he is soundly asleep. What happens in the morning? You wake up pissed off and […]
The post Don’t Go to Bed Angry appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:12:"atom_content";s:3477:"We?ve all been there before. Your lover does something that pisses you off, you get angry, you passive aggressively decide to deal with it later, and then you lay awake all night thinking about what a prick he is while he is soundly asleep. What happens in the morning? You wake up pissed off and sleepy because you were up all night giving him evil looks and poking him. He then wonders why you?re in such a bitchy mood and you don?t understand why he?s so clueless.
Ahhh, the joys of cohabitation.
Many people would rather not discuss issues right away, as tension can be high in the moments immediately following hurt feelings, so they do what is called ?sleeping on it? with hopes that their thoughts will be sorted out by the morning. Sometimes this works, but many times what happens when we go to bed angry, is we let tension and anger simmer for hours.
Studies actually prove that sleep preserves emotionally charged events. Sitting on our hurt feelings can only worsen the way we feel because we develop feelings of self righteousness and resentment towards the other person, and the way we feel will be stored in our permanent memory. We have a whole night to think about what happened from our perspective and to build stories around the actual facts, which is not good for us emotionally or for our partners (or anyone else who has to deal with us the next day).
If you MUST wait until the next morning to deal with the issue at hand, I?d like to offer some tips to calm you down and keep you from doing anything crazy to your beau while he?s asleep.
1. Think about the facts ? not the story that you created around the facts. The facts are what actually happened. Your story is what you felt, thought, blah blah blah.
2. Check your ego – Figure out if you?re feelings are actually hurt, or if your ego just won?t let you back down from your stance.
3. To combat feeling like you?ve been victimized, think about three things that you love about your partner or that your partner does for you for which you can?t thank him enough. This exercise should remind you of how much you appreciate him and why you?re with him in the first place.
4. To combat feelings of self righteousness, I suggest thinking of three things that you do that make you really difficult to deal with. Do you leave your hair in the sink? Do you sing horribly in the shower? Do you wake up super early and expect him to wake up as well even though he doesn?t have to be at work until later in the day? Pick three things that you wouldn?t even be able to stand about yourself. This exercise lessens my feelings of victimization and puts you both on an even playing field, because it reminds you that you are not a perfect princess (as much as you would like to think that you are).
After all of that, if you still feel angry, then I would suggest sleeping on the couch ? or making him!
The post Don’t Go to Bed Angry appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:14:"date_timestamp";i:1640618724;}i:4;a:14:{s:5:"title";s:48:"Wanna Find a Good Man? Simplify Your Checklists!";s:4:"link";s:85:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/wanna-find-a-good-man-simplify-your-checklists/";s:8:"comments";s:93:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/wanna-find-a-good-man-simplify-your-checklists/#respond";s:2:"dc";a:1:{s:7:"creator";s:14:"Shannon Fisher";}s:7:"pubdate";s:31:"Mon, 27 Dec 2021 15:18:00 +0000";s:8:"category";s:100:"Dating AdviceFind a Good ManFind a Manpotential happinessThe age of divorceThe age of women?s rights";s:4:"guid";s:34:"https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=8485";s:11:"description";s:588:"What do I want in a man? Well, he must be taller than me? and make six figures? and have straight, white teeth? and have a college degree from a ‘good’ school? and have grown up with both parents present? and want kids? and be physically fit with a perfect medical record? and be of […]
The post Wanna Find a Good Man? Simplify Your Checklists! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:7:"content";a:1:{s:7:"encoded";s:6501:"What do I want in a man? Well, he must be taller than me? and make six figures? and have straight, white teeth? and have a college degree from a ‘good’ school? and have grown up with both parents present? and want kids? and be physically fit with a perfect medical record? and be of the same faith as me? and have a strong jaw structure and manageable hair? and have had all gorgeous girlfriends in the past, none exceeding my beauty, of course? and be able to read my mind and know when something is wrong, even if I say there?s nothing wrong? and be able to find a cure for AIDS and the secret to world peace.
The above list is a slightly exaggerated rendition of a scenario I?ve seen too many times among urban 20-something women. We are increasingly selective with who we will date and why. We can easily rattle off a list of everything their dream man must have and are often completely unwilling to compromise. We notice that he may fall short in terms of one of the items on our four page list of what we want, and we immediately dismiss him.
Why do we do this?
I have several thoughts on why this growing phenomenon exists:
The women of previous generations had shorter lists. Back then, the most important items on their checklists were: good provider, good father, loyal and nice. Things were much simpler in those days. As a result of the women?s suffrage movement and the rise of feminism which led the denting of the glass ceiling, women are more professionally and financially successful than ever before. This causes some women to feel like they don?t need a significant counterpart because they can provide for themselves. We have become a society that is obsessed with planning. We are willing to wait much longer than the women who came before us to settle down. Our careers and financial well-being have moved up on our priorities lists while family planning gets pushed towards the bottom.
So by the time we hit our mid twenties or early thirties, we feel as though we have acquired the success that we need and that we must then race against the hands of time to find a life partner and pop some babies out before it?s too late to breed healthy offspring or get our youthful shapes back easily. Now the pressure is turned all the way up and we begin to search for a man who meets our standards of success and who has a complementary gene pool.
We have grown up in a society which encourages divorce. This conditioning has caused many of us to take the ?I?ll buy it now, but if I change my mind, I?ll return it to the store tomorrow? approach in many aspects of our lives. These days people seem to be going into relationships thinking in the back of their mind that they can always get out when they?re over it. I think that being conditioned to think this way breeds detachment, the ability to dissociate one?s seemingly rational thoughts from one?s seemingly irrational feelings. We go out on a date with a guy, go down the checklist and if anything is missing, we?re quick to shout ?NEXT!?
I?ve noticed that many of my successful female friends who live in major cities tend to either kick guys to the curb prematurely or keep guys around, not close enough to smother their chances of meeting other men, but just close enough to keep him around in case the future brings rainy days. When I ask these women why they do this, many of them respond that they?re afraid to completely commit because they?re always hopeful for something better and don?t want to block their blessings before they find that something. When I ask why they keep the guys in whom they?re not interested hanging around, they often respond that it?s for insurance purposes – just in case they don?t find that something.
Ladies, this is what we call BBD Syndrome (Bigger, Better Deal syndrome). I believe that Robert Fulghum said it best:
The grass is not, in fact, always greener on the other side of the fence. Fences have nothing to do with it. The grass is greenest where it is watered. When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you may be.
Perhaps this is phenomenon is born of some twisted façade that we subconsciously create – pessimism disguised as skepticism. Are we subconsciously pessimistic about committing to guys who don?t merit the sufficient number of checks on our lists because we?re just picky or because we?re afraid to stumble upon greener pastures after it?s too late?
No one is perfect – not even you. We must be willing to compromise? not on everything, but on minute and superficial details that could be standing in the way of finding and deeply connecting with Mr. Right. Your Prince Charming may have all of the qualities required to make you happy, but may not have perfect teeth or may be shorter than you when you wear 6? Giuseppe Zanotti stilettos. He may be exceptionally driven and goal oriented, but may not possess a degree from an accredited four year university.
Ask yourselves if these small flaws worth throwing away potential happiness without really giving it a chance. Maybe we should re-evaluate our checklists, prioritizing the most important things that will matter now as well as forty years from now and be more pliable with the superficial items on the list.
The post Wanna Find a Good Man? Simplify Your Checklists! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";}s:3:"wfw";a:1:{s:10:"commentrss";s:90:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/wanna-find-a-good-man-simplify-your-checklists/feed/";}s:5:"slash";a:1:{s:8:"comments";s:1:"0";}s:7:"summary";s:588:"What do I want in a man? Well, he must be taller than me? and make six figures? and have straight, white teeth? and have a college degree from a ‘good’ school? and have grown up with both parents present? and want kids? and be physically fit with a perfect medical record? and be of […]
The post Wanna Find a Good Man? Simplify Your Checklists! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:12:"atom_content";s:6501:"What do I want in a man? Well, he must be taller than me? and make six figures? and have straight, white teeth? and have a college degree from a ‘good’ school? and have grown up with both parents present? and want kids? and be physically fit with a perfect medical record? and be of the same faith as me? and have a strong jaw structure and manageable hair? and have had all gorgeous girlfriends in the past, none exceeding my beauty, of course? and be able to read my mind and know when something is wrong, even if I say there?s nothing wrong? and be able to find a cure for AIDS and the secret to world peace.
The above list is a slightly exaggerated rendition of a scenario I?ve seen too many times among urban 20-something women. We are increasingly selective with who we will date and why. We can easily rattle off a list of everything their dream man must have and are often completely unwilling to compromise. We notice that he may fall short in terms of one of the items on our four page list of what we want, and we immediately dismiss him.
Why do we do this?
I have several thoughts on why this growing phenomenon exists:
The women of previous generations had shorter lists. Back then, the most important items on their checklists were: good provider, good father, loyal and nice. Things were much simpler in those days. As a result of the women?s suffrage movement and the rise of feminism which led the denting of the glass ceiling, women are more professionally and financially successful than ever before. This causes some women to feel like they don?t need a significant counterpart because they can provide for themselves. We have become a society that is obsessed with planning. We are willing to wait much longer than the women who came before us to settle down. Our careers and financial well-being have moved up on our priorities lists while family planning gets pushed towards the bottom.
So by the time we hit our mid twenties or early thirties, we feel as though we have acquired the success that we need and that we must then race against the hands of time to find a life partner and pop some babies out before it?s too late to breed healthy offspring or get our youthful shapes back easily. Now the pressure is turned all the way up and we begin to search for a man who meets our standards of success and who has a complementary gene pool.
We have grown up in a society which encourages divorce. This conditioning has caused many of us to take the ?I?ll buy it now, but if I change my mind, I?ll return it to the store tomorrow? approach in many aspects of our lives. These days people seem to be going into relationships thinking in the back of their mind that they can always get out when they?re over it. I think that being conditioned to think this way breeds detachment, the ability to dissociate one?s seemingly rational thoughts from one?s seemingly irrational feelings. We go out on a date with a guy, go down the checklist and if anything is missing, we?re quick to shout ?NEXT!?
I?ve noticed that many of my successful female friends who live in major cities tend to either kick guys to the curb prematurely or keep guys around, not close enough to smother their chances of meeting other men, but just close enough to keep him around in case the future brings rainy days. When I ask these women why they do this, many of them respond that they?re afraid to completely commit because they?re always hopeful for something better and don?t want to block their blessings before they find that something. When I ask why they keep the guys in whom they?re not interested hanging around, they often respond that it?s for insurance purposes – just in case they don?t find that something.
Ladies, this is what we call BBD Syndrome (Bigger, Better Deal syndrome). I believe that Robert Fulghum said it best:
The grass is not, in fact, always greener on the other side of the fence. Fences have nothing to do with it. The grass is greenest where it is watered. When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you may be.
Perhaps this is phenomenon is born of some twisted façade that we subconsciously create – pessimism disguised as skepticism. Are we subconsciously pessimistic about committing to guys who don?t merit the sufficient number of checks on our lists because we?re just picky or because we?re afraid to stumble upon greener pastures after it?s too late?
No one is perfect – not even you. We must be willing to compromise? not on everything, but on minute and superficial details that could be standing in the way of finding and deeply connecting with Mr. Right. Your Prince Charming may have all of the qualities required to make you happy, but may not have perfect teeth or may be shorter than you when you wear 6? Giuseppe Zanotti stilettos. He may be exceptionally driven and goal oriented, but may not possess a degree from an accredited four year university.
Ask yourselves if these small flaws worth throwing away potential happiness without really giving it a chance. Maybe we should re-evaluate our checklists, prioritizing the most important things that will matter now as well as forty years from now and be more pliable with the superficial items on the list.
The post Wanna Find a Good Man? Simplify Your Checklists! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:14:"date_timestamp";i:1640618280;}i:5;a:14:{s:5:"title";s:23:"6 Signs that He?s Cheap";s:4:"link";s:61:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/6-signs-that-hes-cheap/";s:8:"comments";s:69:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/6-signs-that-hes-cheap/#respond";s:2:"dc";a:1:{s:7:"creator";s:14:"Shannon Fisher";}s:7:"pubdate";s:31:"Mon, 27 Dec 2021 15:10:04 +0000";s:8:"category";s:13:"Dating Advice";s:4:"guid";s:34:"https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=8482";s:11:"description";s:549:"In this blog post I will attempt to save you lovely ladies time, energy and money by identifying six key signs that determine whether or not the guy you’re dating is a cheap skate. What he does: He approaches you in a club, engages you in a brief nonversation, then offers to buy you a drink? […]
The post 6 Signs that He’s Cheap appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:7:"content";a:1:{s:7:"encoded";s:3176:"What it means: He had no intention of buying you anything – and probably never will. He probably spotted you earlier in the night and waited for you to purchase your own drink or for someone else to purchase it for you before he decided to pounce. These types of guys, if they get this far, will also take you on a date and insist that you order your wine by the glass? and not by the bottle.
What it means: He is not willing to pay full price for your enjoyment. He is perfectly comfortable rushing to a bar after work in order to get a few $3 drinks in before the clock strikes 7pm. These types of men will also frequently invite you out for coffee, as opposed to a romantic dinner.
What it means: He doesn?t want to spend the money required to take you on a nice date. He would also rather empty out your refrigerator than his own. These types of men have been known to purposely come up with the ?I had to work late and the kitchen at the restaurant closes at 10. Maybe I?ll just come over? excuse.
What it means: He does not want to spend money on a Valentines Day gift or a nice dinner. These types of men have also been known to break up with you just before birthdays, anniversaries and holidays.
What it means: He wants you to pay for the date, whether or not he invited you. His wallet is probably actually in his glove compartment, with the check card in tact.
What it means: He does not want to waste gas money picking you up and taking you home. He is not at all concerned with the gas money you are spending. This type of guy is also likely to park 18 blocks away from the restaurant and force you to walk WITH him in the winter while wearing stilettos – as a frugal alternative to paying for valet service.
If you enjoy being a grown man’s sugar-mama, feel free to consort with these types of men; however if you have no such intention, RUN. FAST.
The post 6 Signs that He’s Cheap appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";}s:3:"wfw";a:1:{s:10:"commentrss";s:66:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/27/6-signs-that-hes-cheap/feed/";}s:5:"slash";a:1:{s:8:"comments";s:1:"0";}s:7:"summary";s:549:"In this blog post I will attempt to save you lovely ladies time, energy and money by identifying six key signs that determine whether or not the guy you’re dating is a cheap skate. What he does: He approaches you in a club, engages you in a brief nonversation, then offers to buy you a drink? […]
The post 6 Signs that He’s Cheap appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:12:"atom_content";s:3176:"What it means: He had no intention of buying you anything – and probably never will. He probably spotted you earlier in the night and waited for you to purchase your own drink or for someone else to purchase it for you before he decided to pounce. These types of guys, if they get this far, will also take you on a date and insist that you order your wine by the glass? and not by the bottle.
What it means: He is not willing to pay full price for your enjoyment. He is perfectly comfortable rushing to a bar after work in order to get a few $3 drinks in before the clock strikes 7pm. These types of men will also frequently invite you out for coffee, as opposed to a romantic dinner.
What it means: He doesn?t want to spend the money required to take you on a nice date. He would also rather empty out your refrigerator than his own. These types of men have been known to purposely come up with the ?I had to work late and the kitchen at the restaurant closes at 10. Maybe I?ll just come over? excuse.
What it means: He does not want to spend money on a Valentines Day gift or a nice dinner. These types of men have also been known to break up with you just before birthdays, anniversaries and holidays.
What it means: He wants you to pay for the date, whether or not he invited you. His wallet is probably actually in his glove compartment, with the check card in tact.
What it means: He does not want to waste gas money picking you up and taking you home. He is not at all concerned with the gas money you are spending. This type of guy is also likely to park 18 blocks away from the restaurant and force you to walk WITH him in the winter while wearing stilettos – as a frugal alternative to paying for valet service.
If you enjoy being a grown man’s sugar-mama, feel free to consort with these types of men; however if you have no such intention, RUN. FAST.
The post 6 Signs that He’s Cheap appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:14:"date_timestamp";i:1640617804;}i:6;a:14:{s:5:"title";s:22:"The 5 Stages of Dating";s:4:"link";s:61:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/22/the-5-stages-of-dating/";s:8:"comments";s:69:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/22/the-5-stages-of-dating/#respond";s:2:"dc";a:1:{s:7:"creator";s:7:"Diana D";}s:7:"pubdate";s:31:"Wed, 22 Dec 2021 15:07:58 +0000";s:8:"category";s:13:"Dating Advice";s:4:"guid";s:34:"https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=8478";s:11:"description";s:548:"Attraction Stage one of dating is, of course, the first encounter. You may have locked eyes across a crowded room. They possibly held a door open for you and it led to the exchange of names and numbers. Perhaps you even rode the same transport route for months, and now that friendly smile developed into […]
The post The 5 Stages of Dating appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:7:"content";a:1:{s:7:"encoded";s:3692:"Stage one of dating is, of course, the first encounter. You may have locked eyes across a crowded room. They possibly held a door open for you and it led to the exchange of names and numbers. Perhaps you even rode the same transport route for months, and now that friendly smile developed into conversation and attraction. It may even be someone you met through an online dating site. Whatever the case may be, you have the initial butterflies. During this period, there are many dates and tons of messages sent back, and forth. This stage usually lasts a couple of months. It is a time to be flirty. Try to focus on the interactions you have with that someone new, rather than an expectation of them.
After about six months or so, your dates are going well. You are seeing each other pretty consistently and still having fun. This stage is where reality starts to set in. As you become closer, the honeymoon phase ends, and now you begin to see little traits in them that annoy you. Unfortunately, this is where many new relationships come to an end. It is essential to communicate your needs, speaking about them clearly and respectively. You want to develop healthy conflict management skills here with your partner.
If you have made it to phase 3, it is where true love begins to hit. This phase is when couples commonly talk about being in an exclusive relationship. Here you may notice a release of oxytocin or the ‘love hormone’ every time your partner shows signs of affection, feelings of trust and contentment. But remember, while being invested in the new romance, take time to nourish yourself, and maintain your individuality.
The fourth stage in a relationship is vital. It is where you begin to let your guard down with your partner and show a level of vulnerability. The intimacy you now experience, ensures you nurture one another. Your needs will evolve as your relationship develops, so it is necessary to adapt to them.
The last stage of a relationship is where the blissful future may begin. You know each other well and are in it for the long haul. Of course, there will always be ups and downs in a relationship, but it is important to apologize when you are wrong and be forgiving. If you have taken each stage of your relationship slowly and grown together, then you are both in for a happy and loving future.
That ?what are we? conversation is never easy, but if you stay open and honest with your partner, you will be sure to have a happy and healthy life together. Using these five stages of dating: your relationship will be on the right path, and if you are single and searching, then look no further. There are plenty of dating sites and apps that cater to every niche and interest. Perhaps you are a fitness enthusiast, vegan, mature single or looking for a christian dating site.
There is an outlet for everyone. So get out there, get dating and find your soulmate!
The post The 5 Stages of Dating appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";}s:3:"wfw";a:1:{s:10:"commentrss";s:66:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/22/the-5-stages-of-dating/feed/";}s:5:"slash";a:1:{s:8:"comments";s:1:"0";}s:7:"summary";s:548:"Attraction Stage one of dating is, of course, the first encounter. You may have locked eyes across a crowded room. They possibly held a door open for you and it led to the exchange of names and numbers. Perhaps you even rode the same transport route for months, and now that friendly smile developed into […]
The post The 5 Stages of Dating appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:12:"atom_content";s:3692:"Stage one of dating is, of course, the first encounter. You may have locked eyes across a crowded room. They possibly held a door open for you and it led to the exchange of names and numbers. Perhaps you even rode the same transport route for months, and now that friendly smile developed into conversation and attraction. It may even be someone you met through an online dating site. Whatever the case may be, you have the initial butterflies. During this period, there are many dates and tons of messages sent back, and forth. This stage usually lasts a couple of months. It is a time to be flirty. Try to focus on the interactions you have with that someone new, rather than an expectation of them.
After about six months or so, your dates are going well. You are seeing each other pretty consistently and still having fun. This stage is where reality starts to set in. As you become closer, the honeymoon phase ends, and now you begin to see little traits in them that annoy you. Unfortunately, this is where many new relationships come to an end. It is essential to communicate your needs, speaking about them clearly and respectively. You want to develop healthy conflict management skills here with your partner.
If you have made it to phase 3, it is where true love begins to hit. This phase is when couples commonly talk about being in an exclusive relationship. Here you may notice a release of oxytocin or the ‘love hormone’ every time your partner shows signs of affection, feelings of trust and contentment. But remember, while being invested in the new romance, take time to nourish yourself, and maintain your individuality.
The fourth stage in a relationship is vital. It is where you begin to let your guard down with your partner and show a level of vulnerability. The intimacy you now experience, ensures you nurture one another. Your needs will evolve as your relationship develops, so it is necessary to adapt to them.
The last stage of a relationship is where the blissful future may begin. You know each other well and are in it for the long haul. Of course, there will always be ups and downs in a relationship, but it is important to apologize when you are wrong and be forgiving. If you have taken each stage of your relationship slowly and grown together, then you are both in for a happy and loving future.
That ?what are we? conversation is never easy, but if you stay open and honest with your partner, you will be sure to have a happy and healthy life together. Using these five stages of dating: your relationship will be on the right path, and if you are single and searching, then look no further. There are plenty of dating sites and apps that cater to every niche and interest. Perhaps you are a fitness enthusiast, vegan, mature single or looking for a christian dating site.
There is an outlet for everyone. So get out there, get dating and find your soulmate!
The post The 5 Stages of Dating appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:14:"date_timestamp";i:1640185678;}i:7;a:14:{s:5:"title";s:41:"A Dating Guide for Gays to Find ?The One?";s:4:"link";s:78:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/22/a-dating-guide-for-gays-to-find-the-one/";s:8:"comments";s:86:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/22/a-dating-guide-for-gays-to-find-the-one/#respond";s:2:"dc";a:1:{s:7:"creator";s:13:"J. T. Ellison";}s:7:"pubdate";s:31:"Wed, 22 Dec 2021 15:03:23 +0000";s:8:"category";s:10:"Love & Sex";s:4:"guid";s:34:"https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=8475";s:11:"description";s:579:"As a gay man, you?ve probably had your fair share of struggles when it comes to finding your ?forever partner.? We don?t blame you: it?s hard out there! Sadly, many guys often run into ?slim pickings? and ultimately settle for a guy they don?t quite mesh with. We wrote this short article to let you […]
The post A Dating Guide for Gays to Find ?The One? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:7:"content";a:1:{s:7:"encoded";s:4646:"As a gay man, you?ve probably had your fair share of struggles when it comes to finding your ?forever partner.? We don?t blame you: it?s hard out there! Sadly, many guys often run into ?slim pickings? and ultimately settle for a guy they don?t quite mesh with. We wrote this short article to let you know two things: a.) you don?t have to settle for a less-than-perfect partner, and b.) the guy you?ve been looking for is probably online!
It might be ineffective, but that doesn?t mean that most men don?t use offline methods first when trying to find a sexy guy nearby. After all, simply searching for someone to hook up with doesn?t seem very romantic, does it? Still, while their hearts may be in the right place, it?s likely to stay there for a very long time since most guys don?t actually meet ?the one? from normal, everyday interactions. The offline approach severely limits your potential partners since you can only pick from men you already know (chances are, you?ve dated quite a few of them!).
Fortunately, there are many online dating websites for seeking gay hookups nearby that can help you find the guy you?re yearning after. Different services cater to different clientele, which is why it?s so important to choose a site that matches your relationship goals. If you join a site specifically for helping men find hookups, then it?s likely you?ll meet someone to spend some fun time with. On the other hand, if your choice of site is purely for romance, you?ll likely find someone who seeks serious relationships.
Finding a one-night stand online is easier than ever! This type of service continues to increase in popularity, which means there are more men looking to hook up online every day. You?ll have plenty of services to choose from, but remember: just because a site is popular doesn?t mean it?s right for you! You want to choose a site with lots of local users, or you?ll struggle to find a match (regardless of how popular the site is!). If you plan on mainly using the service through your phone, a mobile-optimized browser version is a must-have!
Like hookup services, the options are nearly limitless! However, your considerations for these types of sites should be a bit different. There are three main points to think about: Features, User Base, and Accessibility. Most sites offer basic features like chat or member search, but you might also want advanced features like video chatting. Available options vary by site/service so be sure to check beforehand! Like above, having a local user base is essential. Without one, you won?t be able to find any matches nearby. Lastly, you?ll want to find out if the site/service has a mobile version. It?s always helpful to have instant access!
The post A Dating Guide for Gays to Find ?The One? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";}s:3:"wfw";a:1:{s:10:"commentrss";s:83:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/22/a-dating-guide-for-gays-to-find-the-one/feed/";}s:5:"slash";a:1:{s:8:"comments";s:1:"0";}s:7:"summary";s:579:"As a gay man, you?ve probably had your fair share of struggles when it comes to finding your ?forever partner.? We don?t blame you: it?s hard out there! Sadly, many guys often run into ?slim pickings? and ultimately settle for a guy they don?t quite mesh with. We wrote this short article to let you […]
The post A Dating Guide for Gays to Find ?The One? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:12:"atom_content";s:4646:"As a gay man, you?ve probably had your fair share of struggles when it comes to finding your ?forever partner.? We don?t blame you: it?s hard out there! Sadly, many guys often run into ?slim pickings? and ultimately settle for a guy they don?t quite mesh with. We wrote this short article to let you know two things: a.) you don?t have to settle for a less-than-perfect partner, and b.) the guy you?ve been looking for is probably online!
It might be ineffective, but that doesn?t mean that most men don?t use offline methods first when trying to find a sexy guy nearby. After all, simply searching for someone to hook up with doesn?t seem very romantic, does it? Still, while their hearts may be in the right place, it?s likely to stay there for a very long time since most guys don?t actually meet ?the one? from normal, everyday interactions. The offline approach severely limits your potential partners since you can only pick from men you already know (chances are, you?ve dated quite a few of them!).
Fortunately, there are many online dating websites for seeking gay hookups nearby that can help you find the guy you?re yearning after. Different services cater to different clientele, which is why it?s so important to choose a site that matches your relationship goals. If you join a site specifically for helping men find hookups, then it?s likely you?ll meet someone to spend some fun time with. On the other hand, if your choice of site is purely for romance, you?ll likely find someone who seeks serious relationships.
Finding a one-night stand online is easier than ever! This type of service continues to increase in popularity, which means there are more men looking to hook up online every day. You?ll have plenty of services to choose from, but remember: just because a site is popular doesn?t mean it?s right for you! You want to choose a site with lots of local users, or you?ll struggle to find a match (regardless of how popular the site is!). If you plan on mainly using the service through your phone, a mobile-optimized browser version is a must-have!
Like hookup services, the options are nearly limitless! However, your considerations for these types of sites should be a bit different. There are three main points to think about: Features, User Base, and Accessibility. Most sites offer basic features like chat or member search, but you might also want advanced features like video chatting. Available options vary by site/service so be sure to check beforehand! Like above, having a local user base is essential. Without one, you won?t be able to find any matches nearby. Lastly, you?ll want to find out if the site/service has a mobile version. It?s always helpful to have instant access!
The post A Dating Guide for Gays to Find ?The One? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:14:"date_timestamp";i:1640185403;}i:8;a:14:{s:5:"title";s:31:"10 Best Songs About Hating Life";s:4:"link";s:70:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/20/10-best-songs-about-hating-life/";s:8:"comments";s:78:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/20/10-best-songs-about-hating-life/#respond";s:2:"dc";a:1:{s:7:"creator";s:10:"Sarah Hill";}s:7:"pubdate";s:31:"Mon, 20 Dec 2021 16:03:26 +0000";s:8:"category";s:50:"UncategorizedENTERTAINMENThatehatinglifemusicsongs";s:4:"guid";s:34:"https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=8462";s:11:"description";s:561:"Sometimes you just feel like listening to songs about hating life, so here is a list of the 10 best songs about hating life. It’s no coincidence that a few of the songs are recordings by Frank Sinatra. Old Blue Eyes was a great saloon singer and could make you feel instantly gloomy about life […]
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";s:7:"content";a:1:{s:7:"encoded";s:3290:"Sometimes you just feel like listening to songs about hating life, so here is a list of the 10 best songs about hating life. It’s no coincidence that a few of the songs are recordings by Frank Sinatra. Old Blue Eyes was a great saloon singer and could make you feel instantly gloomy about life even if you started out feeling okay. Along with Sinatra, there are some other tunes listed, all of which are gloomy, life-hating classics.
The post 10 Best Songs About Hating Life appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";}s:3:"wfw";a:1:{s:10:"commentrss";s:75:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/20/10-best-songs-about-hating-life/feed/";}s:5:"slash";a:1:{s:8:"comments";s:1:"0";}s:7:"summary";s:561:"Sometimes you just feel like listening to songs about hating life, so here is a list of the 10 best songs about hating life. It’s no coincidence that a few of the songs are recordings by Frank Sinatra. Old Blue Eyes was a great saloon singer and could make you feel instantly gloomy about life […]
The post 10 Best Songs About Hating Life appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:12:"atom_content";s:3290:"Sometimes you just feel like listening to songs about hating life, so here is a list of the 10 best songs about hating life. It’s no coincidence that a few of the songs are recordings by Frank Sinatra. Old Blue Eyes was a great saloon singer and could make you feel instantly gloomy about life even if you started out feeling okay. Along with Sinatra, there are some other tunes listed, all of which are gloomy, life-hating classics.
The post 10 Best Songs About Hating Life appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:14:"date_timestamp";i:1640016206;}i:9;a:14:{s:5:"title";s:35:"10 Songs About Death Of A Loved One";s:4:"link";s:74:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/20/10-songs-about-death-of-a-loved-one/";s:8:"comments";s:82:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/20/10-songs-about-death-of-a-loved-one/#respond";s:2:"dc";a:1:{s:7:"creator";s:13:"J. T. Ellison";}s:7:"pubdate";s:31:"Mon, 20 Dec 2021 15:49:01 +0000";s:8:"category";s:32:"Uncategorizedbestdeathmusicsongs";s:4:"guid";s:34:"https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=8459";s:11:"description";s:571:"Dealing with death is immensely difficult, so if you need music to cope, try these 10 songs about the death of a loved one. These songs about a loved one passing deal with the death of family members as well as friends. The emotional courage that these artists possess on these 10 songs will hopefully […]
The post 10 Songs About Death Of A Loved One appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:7:"content";a:1:{s:7:"encoded";s:3886:"Dealing with death is immensely difficult, so if you need music to cope, try these 10 songs about the death of a loved one. These songs about a loved one passing deal with the death of family members as well as friends. The emotional courage that these artists possess on these 10 songs will hopefully lift your spirits, and allow you to remember the most positive parts of your loved one?s life ? instead of dwelling on their death.
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";}s:3:"wfw";a:1:{s:10:"commentrss";s:79:"https://blog.loveawake.com/2021/12/20/10-songs-about-death-of-a-loved-one/feed/";}s:5:"slash";a:1:{s:8:"comments";s:1:"0";}s:7:"summary";s:571:"Dealing with death is immensely difficult, so if you need music to cope, try these 10 songs about the death of a loved one. These songs about a loved one passing deal with the death of family members as well as friends. The emotional courage that these artists possess on these 10 songs will hopefully […]
The post 10 Songs About Death Of A Loved One appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
";s:12:"atom_content";s:3886:"Dealing with death is immensely difficult, so if you need music to cope, try these 10 songs about the death of a loved one. These songs about a loved one passing deal with the death of family members as well as friends. The emotional courage that these artists possess on these 10 songs will hopefully lift your spirits, and allow you to remember the most positive parts of your loved one?s life ? instead of dwelling on their death.
The post 10 Songs About Death Of A Loved One appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.
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